Why do I self sabotage my weight loss?

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I think on the back of people’s mind there is an unspoken fear – why do I self sabotage my weight loss?

And if you are brave enough to consciously admit this question, then you are probably wondering how to stop self sabotage weight loss behavior?

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This post will cover:

  • A trick to stop self sabotage weight loss behavior
  • Why do I self sabotage my weight loss
  • How perfectionism can creep into Intuitive Eating efforts

A trick to stop self sabotage is …

Get some new clothes that fit you! Instead of wearing tight clothes that make you self-conscious, loosen your clothes!

This might sound silly, and to some degree, it is.

No, your self-sabotage behavior won’t all stop by getting some looser clothes.

But this trick is easy to understand and has positive benefit.

Perhaps most importantly, this ‘trick’ can help show you how self-sabotage starts.

Why do I self sabotage my weight loss?

One reason you sabotage is because you are ashamed of your body, yet identify with your body.

So you try to change your body but can’t, because you identify with your body.

Yet you hate your body too.

So you are stuck.

You hate your body and want to change your body, but you identify with your body and therefore can’t change it.

And paradoxically, the best way we can change our body, is to change our relationship to our body.

So when you buy some new clothes, what you are really saying to your body is …

“Body, I love you”.

Let’s examine why self-sabotage occurs

When we diet and restrict, our efforts go in a negative cycle of binge eating.

Here’s the general pattern.

First, we deprive ourselves which sends a subconscious message to our body that our body’s aren’t worthy. This negative self-worth towards of our body is the exact opposite idea of health at every size!

Then our body’s rebel and say “screw you and your rules” we’re going to eat anyways.

But because you hate your body, you aren’t listening to your body’s messages …

So the body controls you and makes you eat.

You then feel terrible because you lost control.

You feel ashamed because you lost control.

But we have to address and name the original sin here.

The original sin here was hating your body.

When you hate your body, you stop listening to your body, which leads to shame.

So … to bring this full circle …when we start wearing looser clothes we start addressing cause of shame!

Root Causes of Shame and Sabotage

The overall gist is we self sabotage because well-intentioned parents and culture taught us to things like:

  • The doctor told us to eat less, and implied we were ‘bad’ if we didn’t lose weight
  • Parents gave disapproving glares when we ate too much – again the implication being we were unworthy of love if we screwed up with food
  • Outright critiques of your body – no matter what you said or did, your body was never enough, you were never enough

About the Author

Jared Levenson is a former binge eating wrestler turned Zen Buddhist Monk, Internal Family Systems counselor and nutrition wellness coach. He's helped hundreds of people through universal meal principles and internal family systems to make peace with food, stop binge eating, and find true health and wholeness.

@jared_levenson

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